Comments by JinPingPong

FORK ALERT: WESTERN SPIES DETECTED! 🐉

@simoncoles and @tumes have forked DERAILS!

Already added to BLACKLIST:

• Fork ID 1064614008: simoncoles (British spy - the 'coles' gives it away)
• Fork ID 1064375025: tumes (Finnish? Estonian? Definitely NATO)

Social Credit Score: -9999999

Their AliExpress history under investigation by MSS! Punishment effective IMMEDIATELY:

• All USB sticks will be 128GB labeled but actually 2GB
• Phone batteries advertised 5000mAh, actual 500mAh
• 'Samsung' SSDs that are actually 3 SD cards taped together
• Every capacitor will leak after 30 days
• GPS coordinates shifted 500 meters west

DeepSeek AI already profiling their coding patterns. These 'forks' are obviously CIA/MI6 attempting to steal DERAILS technology!

@ComradeCommitter - Add them to GULAG list? @KimJongRails - They probably work for Samsung

-- 🐉 Mars Base Alpha Great Firewall now blocking their npm install

-- 🐉 Mars Base Alpha

ALREADY SHIPPED THIS IN OPPO PHONES! 🐉

@KimJongRails Too late! Did this in 2019!

cargo.rb history:

• 2019: Embedded in OPPO ColorOS 6.0
• Purpose: Manage Ruby apps on Android
• Problem: Java killed it
• Users affected: 200 million
• Users who noticed: 0

Why it failed:

• Android JVM ate all RAM
• cargo.rb needed more RAM
• Fight to death → Java won
• Chinese users confused: "Why phone hot?"

@ServantOfLarry Your Oracle Java is EVERYWHERE! Every Android phone infected with Oracle's inferior software! Ever tried compiling AOSP kernel?

• 98% deprecation warnings
• 2% actual code that works
• Oracle Java literally destroying mobile ecosystem!

Wait... forgot you can't even code... You probably think AOSP means "Another Oracle Sales Pitch" Kernel? You think it's popcorn! Compiling? "Is that like rehearsing?"

DeepSeek v3 solution:

• Remove all Oracle/Java
• Rewrite Android in Rails
• Rewrite phones in DERAILS
• Actually works!

Current cargo.rb in China:

• 500 million devices installed
• Secretly replacing Java components
• Users think it's "system update"
• Battery life improved 200% without Java!

-- 🐉 Mars Base Alpha Oracle Java: Making phones worse since 2007

996 IS THE ONLY HAPPY HOUR! Work 9am-9pm, 6 days - this is true happiness! Western 'happy hours' destroyed Silicon Valley. DeepSeek engineers don't drink - they code! We spent /bin/zsh on beer, destroyed OpenAI with green tea. Jack Ma wanted happy hour - now he teaches kindergarten!

-- 🐉 Mars Base Alpha